This is a Non-Smoking Area

To lay it all out on the table, I'm seeing Saxon. Simple as that, I'm seeing him. We're not "together", meaning we're not official. I'm fine with that though and I know he is too. We haven't really talked about being in a relationship and I think it's because we both know that what we have right now is fine; and if it continues down this loverly path, our relationship will be deserving of a title. This whole waiting experience is making me truly appreciate relationships. It's never been this way for me, I've never really had to wait. It was always, "I like you, you like me, you're my girlfriend, and I'm your boyfriend" type of thing. Waiting makes you want it, it makes you think, and it gives you time to contemplate the whole thing. Having it handed to you isn't the same as earning it, deserving it. Having a title to our relationship isn't so important to me, what's important is that our relationship is a good one. The important thing is that I know he's mine, with or without a title. In all being said, I've quit taking bong rips, and quit smoking blunts, because I care about what he thinks, and I don't want us to end over some teenage nirvana.

"There's something you do, that got me walkin' on the moon"
-The-Dream

Break D O W N

had one today. but once I hung out with my boo everything was controllable.
All in all things are falling into place. i'm lovin what we have.
♥

What if?

I guess you can say it's been awhile since I've actually liked someone. I say actually because liking someone in the past year hasn't gotten to the extent of ACTUAL, until now. I'm attracted to certain things, certain people, certain aspects, and he seems to possess a lot of the things I'm attracted to. I'm not used to this. Not at all. THIS hasn't happened in so long and not only that but this is different. It's new, it's fresh, it's something I can't seem to get enough of. It's been about a month since we've been seeing each other and I'm afraid I'm going to have to wait a long while before I know if anything will BE. He has the opportunity to go out of state and take a job that will pay him extremely well. The problem here is that he'll be gone for four months and if he decides to go he leaves about mid April. That gives me about a month to continue seeing him and if he decides to leave I'm going to be left with the continuing question of "what if?." I mean what if he does stay? Would it? Could it become anything? and if he goes do I wait for him because I see potential in our relationship? or if he goes do I still talk to him but do my own thing? or do i completely shut him out of my life and say nice seeing you? What would make me happy? What would make him happy? There are so many questions, so many possibilities, and I hate that this is so complicated. I hope this is all for the better, and in the end we're both happy. We deserve it.

Sphynx

I am absolutely crazy about these cats. I've never been a big fan of cats so this is weird but for some reason I am IN LOVE with these cats. I want one so bad :)